Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
