You're so nebulous sometimes
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
