So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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