white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
