Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I think my fart just growled at me.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
