That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
