I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
