i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I am one with the molecules
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
