Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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