Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize