what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
