you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
