I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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