At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Randomize
