Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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