babies were throwing up all over the place
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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