the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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