First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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