U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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