Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
