omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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