forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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