She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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