I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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