You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
