I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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