he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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