idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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