Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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