Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
