Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
