so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
