So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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