I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
My pussy is not your playground.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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