too bad you live with your parents still
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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