Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
