Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
