I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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