R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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