from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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