you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
