Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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