So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
