you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
