I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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