You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
