mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
a search helicopter?!
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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