I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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