Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Randomize
