11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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